Erik
We are delighted to sit down today with Mike and Erin Allen. Dear friends of ours from long, long ago and welcome to the What Could Go Right? podcast.
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Erik
I am Erik Orton.
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Emily
I'm Emily Orton and.
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Erik
Here we talk about personal growth, family connection and raising adult kids so that you can thrive as a person, partner and parent and make your midlife more meaningful. Did I get that right?
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Emily
That's a lot of alliterative things going on.
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Erik
And now you're going to read a little bit about our our wonderful guests today.
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Emily
Yeah, we just got so lucky, too, that our paths have crisscross over and over again, and I think we're kind of leaving our lives together. But let me tell you about them. Erin was born and raised in Magrath, Alberta, which just sounds magical Canada, and spent her childhood running around barefoot with her cousins. She's a former middle and high school teacher turned yoga instructor and co-founder of The Light Within US with her husband, Michael Brady, of course.
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Emily
And Michael. Okay. He's like that. That's okay. All right. Next year, long distance running fills her up, as does reading multiple books at the same time. After living in New York City in the Bay Area, she and her family moved back to Utah during the pandemic. She considers her role as a mother of five children the most sacred, rewarding and challenging work she's ever done alongside her best friend and husband.
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Emily
Same person, Mike Michael. Michael was born in Arizona and grew up in Salt Lake City, Utah, which is where we're recording this podcast. He served a full time mission for two years in Sao Paulo, Brazil. I say it correctly and then return to BYU to graduate with a BFA in graphic design. He's had the opportunity to work in Salt Lake City, New York City, the Bay Area, at great companies, including DoorDash Profit.
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Emily
I went to your office there and I think Johnson and Johnson struck and Pentagram New York. In 2021, Mike left the corporate world and co-founded the Life Within US and his wife with his wife, Erin, consisting of retreats, classes and intentional gatherings, and later became a co-founder of the peer group Brotherhood, whose mission is to forge a global, global brotherhood of support and growth.
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Emily
He's the grateful father of five children and blessed husband of Erin, and that gives us a lot to dig into because that is exactly what we want to talk about. I remember Eric and I were traveling with four of our five kids. We were in Salerno, Italy. We were on a dock, and I called you on the phone, Erin.
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Emily
And I remember you said to me not an exact quote, but the idea was we figured out what our purpose in life is. We know it. We know what it is now. And I just felt like I electricity running through my body and I felt so happy for you to feel like you had such a clear path to get started on.
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Emily
And that's the journey that I would love to hear more about what the purpose is, how you got started, like, what kind of obstacles popped up, what you've been learning along the way. Well, come in and ask questions as you go. But for me, that's where where I would love to start was just that search for your purpose and then I guess finding it.
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Emily or Erin
Emily I remember that conversation. I remember exactly where I was sitting here crying with you as we talked about this sacred things. That discovery was made after a lot of hard and a lot of challenge and all that might maybe get into more of the details around like his perspective, his experience with that. But more straightforward things are just not going well with his job.
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Emily or Erin
It was feeling very heavy. It was feeling maybe like, am I even on the right path? And I was homeschooling at a time with the kids and trying to support my own, you know, process. Grace During that time, I wasn't feeling as lost, but I was definitely concerned with just like how, how much of a struggle it had been.
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Emily or Erin
Like, do you want to tell the story from your perspective? Like the, the meeting that kind of launched everything?
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Mike Allen
Well, yeah, I'll say I have been I had I've had like an amazing career professionally, right? I feel like really fortunate. And the things that I've been able to to do and there was a time we'll get too much in the details. There was a time at a particular company where I was just like really struggling. I kind of felt like I lost my way or something.
00;10;40;40 - 00;10;58;57
Mike Allen
It was a very dynamic, different environment than what I was used to. I had been through a couple of there was just a lot of change, and so I had a couple of different bosses in quick succession and I was just not jiving well with the team or the situation I was in and felt, yeah, very disoriented, I felt very lost.
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Mike Allen
I felt a lot of like self-doubt, like I might even leave and go do what I do suddenly, you know, after like more than a decade of experience, of experience and like, you know, doing good work and whatever, I was just like really, in this funky self-doubt stage.
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Erik
I remember being in your home area is like part of this because we were we were just coming out of Yosemite. We were hanging out. Yes. You were telling us.
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Emily or Erin
That the exact timing. Yeah.
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Erik
Yeah.
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Mike Allen
All right. Yeah. Yeah. So it was a bit of a struggle and it kind of was taken a toll on my confidence, on my, like, sense of direction, on my vision for the future. You know, I had sort of I mean, I had selected a career in design and I just thought like, I love design, and I'm like, I'll just I'm just going to do this forever.
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Mike Allen
Like, that was just kind of the the expectation. And when we talk about figuring out a purpose, you know, there was I feel like we've lived fairly intentional lives throughout our, you know, our married life together. But seldom did we actually, like take the time to sit down and get really clear about it. It was just sort of family centered and career driven.
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Mike Allen
Like where we lived was based on career. A lot of decisions we made was based on what we just felt was best for the family. And so all that was in place. But it was it wasn't something we often said, like, what do we want really? You know, it wasn't even considered. It was just like, that's just sort of I was just kind of it.
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Mike Allen
Right. And and I think those were good things. It just it didn't feel as deliberate as as clear as intentional. So that's a little backdrop for we suddenly hit this this turbulence, right. With with this idea of what my path is. And suddenly it looks really fuzzy, like the future looks blurrier than it ever had before or during this stage.
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Mike Allen
And and I was just yeah. And mentally kind of struggling and feeling a lot of doubt. And I went into a meeting one day that was just like the worst meeting of my career. Like I went in. It was sort of impromptu, like where they call it performance review. It was sort of quarterly.
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Emily or Erin
Review review.
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Erik
But impromptu.
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Mike Allen
It was well.
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Erik
Unscheduled. It was performance review is usually never good news. It was the kind of.
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Mike Allen
Thing where like they were supposed to have happened a while ago, and I think we were I was out of town or something, so it got missed. And then like later it came up and I was like, Well, let's just do it right now. And so we went and, and and it was just like a terrible meeting for me.
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Mike Allen
I would and I literally have the, like, fight or flight response while we were going through everything. Like I just and my, my response was flight. But I couldn't leave the room. So I was just trapped there and just kind of like my brain was working. Clearly, I like I couldn't defend myself. Well, I mean, it was it was a bad situation.
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Mike Allen
So I get I have that. I go out of that meeting just feeling like terrible. I get home.
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Emily or Erin
I still remember your countenance, like, Yeah, crestfallen, heavy. You walked through the door just yeah, we put the kids to bed, you got settled and you sat down and Aaron, we need to have a conversation. I actually don't know if I'm gonna have a job on Monday. And that's the start of the conversation.
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Mike Allen
Yeah, I mean, that hadn't been said in the review, but I was like, If this is how things feel like they're going, like, it's not. It's not like you want anywhere good. I was like, this might be over and what does that mean for us and for our family? And so I just, like laid out all of my fears, concerns.
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Mike Allen
I probably was overexaggerating it, you know, just based on how I was feeling, because I didn't get fired like when I went back the next year.
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Erik
But you got to know that. Exactly.
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Mike Allen
Know what I mean?
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Erik
You just you were trying to read the tea leaves.
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Mike Allen
Exactly. Yeah, but it felt like it, you know, it was headed that direction. So I remember just laying out all my fears and worries and frustrations and just kind of dumping it all. And and just like a pro was just holding space for me and just letting me talk and like, wasn't getting caught up in all of the worries and stuff that I was feeling.
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Mike Allen
She was just kind of like respecting that. That's where I was, that she was holding her space and I got through all of it. And then finally Aaron's like, like, Can I say something now?
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Erik
Good. Listening? Good. Aaron Ready to go?
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Emily or Erin
And, well, I really want to be honest here. Like, the Lord gets the credit for that. I have an excellent worrier and like, my typical response would be to be very caught up and very concerned. But honestly, I just felt so peaceful and I felt excited. I remember just like I'm listening and suddenly I started getting this big smile on my face.
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Erik
You're like, Why are you smiling at my worst moment?
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Emily or Erin
It was really it was really I was so genuinely happy because I could feel the spirit telling me, This is so good. This is so good. And I remember telling you, I was like, I honestly am so grateful that things went the way they did today because I think this is going to be the thing that's going to push you to discover what you're really meant to do on this earth.
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Emily or Erin
And we started delving in and we started writing. We started discovering, and it was unlike anything we've ever done before. I don't know that we would ever do that if we were in our comfort zone. Yeah. And through that experience, I've learned that, like when things fall apart or the Red Rips out from under you, that's actually an opportunity, an amazing opportunity.
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Emily or Erin
There's always goodness on the other side of that. Anyway, if you.
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Mike Allen
Choose it like Aaron did.
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Emily or Erin
I don't know. I just feel like when we get pushed out of the comfort zone is because there's more like opportunity. There's there's more. Yeah, there is. We're meant to grow. We're meant to expand. And I feel like comfort zones keep you kind of small, you know? Anyway, so we started writing. Yeah, I remember we just both got out blank papers and sat on our counter.
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Emily or Erin
Right.
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Mike Allen
And I think the first prompt was what is most important to you?
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Emily or Erin
Yeah.
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Mike Allen
Like, what is the most, what are the most important things? And we just.
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Erik
Turned to.
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Emily or Erin
The
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Mike Allen
So we wrote for ourselves. Okay. Right. Like, okay, I'll, I'll write my answers. You write your answers and then let's compare and look at our these are the same right. Like top two or three were the same. And then, you know, there's some differences and it's like, okay, cool. I can like support you with that and you can support me with this.
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Mike Allen
And you know, let's just figure it out. But I just have to like reemphasize how significant it was, like the headspace I was in and the way that I was feeling that night. It just completely flat on its head. And instead of I was imagining this like, this is going to be a crappy weekend where I'm going to be like looking for jobs or something online and like calling, you know, talking to my friends.
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Mike Allen
Like, Hey, how are you guys hiring over there? A lot of like and instead it was just this kind of these blue sky questions, right? Instead, it was this very creative and exciting co discovery process of just getting clear, like get like, let's get clarity on all the things because I think we had just slipped into, yeah, there was this comfort zone and there was habit and there was sort of like, This is just our lives and we're just doing it every day, you know, like we got our routine and then this, this event that my workplace just shook it up enough that we, it allowed us to take a step back and reevaluate our
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Mike Allen
entire lives. You know, it was like, let's just pretend that we don't have all these constraints. Like, what would we choose? What would we do? You guys asked the question of, like, if money were no object, like, what would you do? And then you figure it out later, right? Yeah. And I'm sure we were like feeling some of that influence because we had had many conversations prior to the Navigator's framework and, you know, things that you guys have established now.
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Mike Allen
So I'm sure subliminally that was all in there.
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Emily or Erin
So this has been planted a long time ago and I'm so, so grateful for that. I remember our link papers. You remember we compared them and we had the exact same word at the top of our list, which is family, and not just our family, but like families. That family is fairly important. Yeah, families of the world like and a deep desire to strengthen families.
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Emily or Erin
And I mean, I don't know how we want to go. There's a lot to talk about, but maybe just long story short, over the course of the weekend, it just felt there were uploads. Like, just like often we get visualized things we'd never visualized before. We're like, my goodness, what if we did this? We did this. And one of the things that was so beautiful that was such a breakthrough was all of the education, all of the experience that like he had in his branding career, which he was like, Am I even on the right path?
00;20;05;20 - 00;20;36;45
Emily or Erin
Is this even fulfilling? Is this meaningful? And like any sort of like eternal since the Lord helped us to see, my goodness, if you shift that towards the family and helping families get really clear on their core values, their guiding principles on their purpose, like how powerful, how strengthening is like he'd been prepared all along. And I just love that moment that like a ha moment where I, I feel like we just like you cry.
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Emily or Erin
We you're just like, my goodness. All along. Like, yeah, we have been prepared all along. We didn't even know it, but like, here it is and here's what you're meant to do. And then again, just like it could expand to do this, it could get inspired to do that. But like that, we get some we started to, like, create our own, as we call it, the Custom Purpose Guide.
00;20;53;46 - 00;21;04;09
Emily or Erin
And it's a branding exercise, but it's for families, it's for individuals. And we did it for our family. And that was such an amazing experience to get really clear what is our family all about? What our core values.
00;21;04;14 - 00;21;26;30
Erik
Can I jump in here? yeah, Yeah. Because I know your remembering the conversation that you two had about, Hey, we've kind of discovered it. And then I remember you were taking all of your branding. I don't want to say branding exercises, but I feel like the process that you go through with a company, you said, We're going to turn it and we're going to shine it on a family in the family because of this experience.
00;21;26;35 - 00;21;44;45
Erik
And I remember we were visiting my parents at the time. We had our kids with us and we sat out on my parents back deck and we went through this as I mean, I remember where we were when we went to do this, this exercise. And and we still have our crest that sits, you know, where we can see it in our home.
00;21;44;50 - 00;21;51;30
Erik
And so why don't you guys talk a little bit about that process and then I want to discuss about where it's kind of gone from there.
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Emily or Erin
I just want to say one thing I have well, two things probably. First of all, I just love the story about all the blessings that were in the blurry times like that, that blessings and blurt. Yes, that led me to dig for something deeper. And that really turned the soil, which I love that you guys approached it that way, that you were willing to be humble and brave enough to adjust your perspective on the situation.
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Emily or Erin
And like you said, you had help from the Lord and that I also really loved how earlier and you said that my countenance was crestfallen. And at the end of the experience I came away saying like, we are going to like lift up these crests for our families, right? Like, we are going to like I don't I don't know.
00;22;40;12 - 00;23;09;18
Emily or Erin
The opposite of crestfallen crest raised the crest lifted the present lifted. But it really is just trying to help people get super clear on I think even having values before you start setting goals is, you know, the the more important thing. And I love that we have ours and we come back to it again and again. We it has many parts, right?
00;23;09;18 - 00;23;33;26
Emily or Erin
There are images that go with it and then there are phrases that go with it. And there's a motto basically, which I guess would be in in business. It would be like you're a one liner, but you're mean. And that purpose and that is short enough that I can always remember without review. And ours is as children of our Heavenly Father, we seek as children of God, we seek the best for ourselves and others.
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Emily or Erin
But it's just a pursuit of excellence mentality, free for everyone, operating for everyone. Yeah.
00;23;42;08 - 00;23;43;30
Erik
And it took us a while to get to that.
00;23;43;30 - 00;23;45;54
Emily or Erin
It took us a long time to.
00;23;45;54 - 00;24;10;20
Mike Allen
Distill all of these things that you're all about down into one phrase. It is. It is work, It's it. But there's power in those words, right? And the meaning behind them, that's that's one of our guiding principles, of our thing, is that thoughts and words have power to create. And the the crest and the purpose statement is a manifestation of that concept.
00;24;10;20 - 00;24;33;46
Mike Allen
Right? It's like we put the thought and the words here and it's now creating so many aspects of our lives. Because I love that you brought out the distinction between like a purpose or an intention and a goal, because I think that the purpose in the intention precedes the goal, right? And even the significance of the goal. And I love that personally.
00;24;33;46 - 00;24;51;44
Mike Allen
I'm I'm not really great at setting goals and having like a checklist of all the things that I'm going to do. But I do I do feel like knowing what my intention is and what my purposes drives me to do those things anyway, whether or not they're on a checklist, if that makes sense, it does.
00;24;51;45 - 00;25;14;15
Emily or Erin
Because when you know your value system and your and your purpose, then you have a a rubric or a really clear filter for deciding what you're going to say yes to and what you say no to. So you aren't just shooting your energy out in every direction. And so you you progress. Yeah. Because you're like, does it heading north, you know, is that north then?
00;25;14;19 - 00;25;16;42
Emily or Erin
Then I'm going there. Yeah.
00;25;16;47 - 00;25;41;52
Mike Allen
So to get to your question of like, what does it kind of give us the overview. Okay. So yeah, it starts with the core values. And the core values are like, you are what? Like what are the most important things in your life? And that's where a lot of people go to like, yeah, it's like faith and family and it's or even certain kind of attributes like charity and kindness, compassion, whatever, all these good things, right?
00;25;41;57 - 00;26;04;47
Mike Allen
Whatever they may be. So that's the first thing you figure out. What is your core values? You're what? Yeah, your core values. Then we get into the guiding principles, which are a little bit more of an expansion on that. So if we're talked about what's most important, the guiding principles are like the how like how do you fulfill these things, How do you live them?
00;26;04;52 - 00;26;14;56
Mike Allen
And they're just these beautiful little nuggets of wisdom and truth, right? And you guys are full of these. Like you have so many good guiding principles that we've learned from you that you've shared with us.
00;26;15;10 - 00;26;30;49
Erik
This was so fun. We did this as a family because we're like, these nuggets are like, like, what are the things that are said on repeat Your family? Yes. And I remember one of them was, what could you write? What could go right? Trial and error works every time was another one.
00;26;31;03 - 00;26;31;24
Mike Allen
nice.
00;26;31;34 - 00;26;33;34
Erik
Anyway, we made a whole list. We just had a blast.
00;26;33;34 - 00;26;34;21
Emily or Erin
Good stuff.
00;26;34;30 - 00;26;46;42
Erik
Cause, you know, like, our kids would be like, Dad always says this, Mom always says this. And we're like, Well, you always say this, but you just had a great time realizing, kind of like the threads that have woven the tapestry of our family culture.
00;26;46;42 - 00;27;01;31
Emily or Erin
Well, I mean, this is already in you. You're living it. They gather all in one place and put it into words. It's a treasure to codify it and think, Yeah. And then we could say, yeah, that is who we are. Like, it's holding a mirror back to us and just really reframe.
00;27;01;43 - 00;27;20;49
Erik
And I love that you're talking about what coming before how Emily and I are big proponents of that that don't. Because if we start with how, then we're limiting ourselves to what we know what we have, what we're sure we're capable of, what we have experience with. But when we go to the what first, you're talking about values.
00;27;20;49 - 00;27;26;43
Erik
But you know, and then I often talk about like, you know, what are the things that you that you seek?
00;27;26;54 - 00;27;27;58
Mike Allen
What are your dreams? Right.
00;27;27;58 - 00;27;28;16
Emily or Erin
Yeah.
00;27;28;31 - 00;27;43;32
Erik
Visions sometimes are what the think the what is bigger than our current house? Yeah. We have to grow our our how or who we are to to receive or be capable of or comfortable with bigger, bigger words. Yeah. So anyway, so keep going.
00;27;43;32 - 00;27;59;23
Mike Allen
Love that. I'm so glad you added that. That's such a good insight to that process that I hadn't fully considered. So thank you. So went after going through the guiding principles, which is the how the purpose is the why.
00;27;59;28 - 00;28;00;06
Erik
That is what.
00;28;00;06 - 00;28;14;51
Mike Allen
How and why. Yeah, it's your why. And there are a lot of brand experts out there and people that talk about this like Simon Sinek is, is, has like a famous thing about like get to your why it's the golden circle or something.
00;28;14;51 - 00;28;27;29
Emily or Erin
I forget most people ignore it. You might if you're listening to this, you might know like your company might do this where they ask you what's your why? And you'll say it's your family, and then they'll give you incentives that take you away from your family and they aren't.
00;28;27;34 - 00;28;28;30
Erik
Going to take.
00;28;28;35 - 00;28;47;09
Emily
You. They are actually aligned like they say, like Simon Sinek said, to figure out your why. So now that we know your why, right? And then and then it doesn't change anything. It's not like, we're going to anyway. I have lots of ideas that can be up with how you can align your reward system with your evaluations.
00;28;47;10 - 00;28;48;36
Erik
Needs solving in this area.
00;28;48;38 - 00;28;50;06
Emily or Erin
And.
00;28;50;11 - 00;29;13;10
Mike Allen
It so yeah, the why is the purpose statement and it's literally answering the question, why am I here on this earth or why is our family here? Like, why what, what is, what is the intention? What is the purpose? And there's a lot of different ways to arrive at ideas to to get this I you know, to get this kind of locked in.
00;29;13;14 - 00;29;35;14
Mike Allen
And I've been kind of focusing on this more for individuals lately just because that's more of the work I'm doing. This applies to individuals and families, right? Yeah, but also sometimes people to think about just without overthinking it. Like what are the things that bring you the greatest joy and fulfillment? Like just list those. What is it? Because often that's like your purpose is right in there, right?
00;29;35;14 - 00;29;44;55
Mike Allen
Just the things you're naturally drawn to do. Another one, which Aaron talks about a lot. In fact, maybe you can talk about the way that our adversities.
00;29;44;55 - 00;30;09;58
Emily or Erin
Yeah. Yes, it's been interesting because we've done that this guy was an of individuals and families over the years that we've noticed. A very interesting pattern is that so often challenge and trial is deeply connected to purpose, like our pain is connected to our purpose. And so that's a good place to pay attention. You get curious like what have been my personal challenges and trials?
00;30;09;58 - 00;30;24;56
Emily or Erin
Because I feel like, again, God wants us to serve from a place of authenticity, a place of experience. And so often those trials and challenges are education or preparation for the work we have to do on this earth.
00;30;25;01 - 00;30;34;32
Erik
And do you have an example you can give? Because that's a great concept, but I think for some of us it might be hard to say, Yeah, what is that? What does that mean?
00;30;34;37 - 00;30;49;36
Emily or Erin
So and then you have well, because the Galloway's come to my introduction. So as a family, maybe you have one for an individual that we did this for a beautiful family back in California. They have a daughter who has special needs and their purpose. I wish I had it word for word.
00;30;49;48 - 00;30;52;21
Mike Allen
One part of it is to defend the defenseless, to.
00;30;52;21 - 00;30;55;50
Emily or Erin
Defend the defenseless, and to just accept everyone, embrace everyone.
00;30;55;50 - 00;30;56;29
Mike Allen
As they are.
00;30;56;29 - 00;31;16;34
Emily or Erin
And that's right. And I just feel like they just did that. They that's how they lived. If you knew them, their arms were around you and they were they were defenders, you know. And so it was just beautiful to see how they lived that when they got clear in that purpose, I was like, my goodness. Like, it was just so genuine and so authentic.
00;31;16;36 - 00;31;22;14
Emily or Erin
Coming from their own family's experience, it's that's just one example. Do you have from like an individual?
00;31;22;16 - 00;32;09;48
Mike Allen
Well, yeah, one one of my co-founders partner is he only a few years ago he went through a really dark time and got pretty close to the point where he was like, thinking of just ending it all, like got to that suicidal ideation place and got right up to the edge and thankfully backed away from that as a text message came in at the right moment that sort of shook him out of that headspace he was in and after doing lots of healing and work and therapy and repairing his relationship with his wife and his kids and everything, he is now such an advocate for suicide prevention and helping people when they're feeling utterly alone
00;32;09;48 - 00;32;28;02
Mike Allen
and depressed because he's like, I've been there and I know what that feels like. And now his mission is to, like, reach out to people that are in a similar spot and like, help them. And he's like, and there's this genuine empathy and authenticity and being able to serve people better in that situation because he's you.
00;32;28;02 - 00;32;28;53
Emily or Erin
Know, he's brought.
00;32;28;57 - 00;32;29;21
Mike Allen
In some.
00;32;29;21 - 00;32;31;29
Emily or Erin
Version, people are drawn to him.
00;32;31;34 - 00;32;33;13
Mike Allen
So that's like another example.
00;32;33;14 - 00;32;37;59
Erik
That's yeah, that's perfect. Okay. So we can often find our purpose in our pain.
00;32;38;10 - 00;33;14;05
Emily or Erin
Yeah. Yeah. Well, I can say that is, that's the foundation of our story as well for what we're doing because we were we were moving along, pursuing our goals and raising our family. And then, you know, Eric produced a show off-Broadway that failed, and he had given up his job to do that. And then it was just like it was a really hard was he was the poster boy for failure because it was literally on the cover of Crain's Business Weekly in New York City as like, Here's what's wrong with the business model of our brand.
00;33;14;10 - 00;33;46;38
Emily or Erin
And he just kind of went into hiding and we had to go through this like digging and discovering time. And it was really hard for me too, when we decided to live on a table that was facing a lot of fears that I had a lot of getting out of our comfort zone and we really did. We felt deeply that these things were for other people, but we were so attracted to the messages, we would hear that like, we're capable of more, we're capable, more capable of more right there was a slight tension between how we felt and how we wanted to feel.
00;33;46;39 - 00;34;20;57
Emily or Erin
Okay, yeah, we want to believe that's possible. And and then actually doing it and how how hard it was. And it's transformative because you go through a complete, like spiritual overhaul of like who you think you are and can be. And, and when we realized that us broke living in a tiny apartment with little kids and a child with special needs and everything that we could do to pull off something like that and then pull off something like that again and again and again, we were like, everybody's other people like you.
00;34;21;02 - 00;34;39;08
Emily or Erin
You can do this. You have more choices than you think. And so that kind of became our drama. Like you have more choices and everything we create is trying to help people figure out like whatever angle, whatever end to unlock that door from the inside, to come out of the comfort zone and be like, I can do those things.
00;34;39;08 - 00;34;51;05
Emily or Erin
I can consider those options. I am capable of more than I thought. So I think I mean, I think that's our story, obviously. Like, can you imagine doing the work you doing had you not gone through that live? Which what would you even have.
00;34;51;14 - 00;34;51;31
Erik
Wouldn't.
00;34;51;31 - 00;35;14;29
Emily or Erin
Exist? Yes, right. It's like, you know, so, so much creation comes through that like deconstruction and that like, you know what I mean? And then that's just amazing. It's amazing. Well, and we go through it multiple. Exactly. That's exactly right. And but but you're less scared once you on it deliberately not for time getting excited. Yeah. Okay. We're going to do that again.
00;35;14;34 - 00;35;18;56
Mike Allen
But it starts with courage. And then you do it more and it becomes confidence, right?
00;35;19;07 - 00;35;20;38
Emily or Erin
Because I know that this.
00;35;20;41 - 00;35;22;27
Mike Allen
Doesn't make it easy every time, but.
00;35;22;27 - 00;35;24;17
Emily or Erin
Like there's an experienced.
00;35;24;22 - 00;35;42;40
Mike Allen
But I was going to just mention the point that this idea of defining purpose it's not a you said at one time and that's it for eternity. Right? Like our purpose can grow and evolve with us. And depending on different stages of life. And so it's something to consider revisiting every so.
00;35;42;40 - 00;36;01;54
Emily or Erin
Often we revisit it hours before, and I love thinking of it as like this, like living, breathing document that can grow with you. I mean, as our kids grow, like maybe there's different things to focus on that can be more resonant or more meaningful in this new stage of life that we're in or whatever. But that's what I love and like.
00;36;01;59 - 00;36;14;29
Emily or Erin
The work is just as meaningful in any states that you visited. Like our are now old enough that they can be a real part of this instead of just as as parents, kind of like be like, here it is. Right? Mom and dad. Yeah. Is at.
00;36;14;29 - 00;36;15;08
Erik
Present to the.
00;36;15;10 - 00;36;17;29
Emily or Erin
Exactly so because they're older. Exactly.
00;36;17;36 - 00;36;20;30
Erik
Actually, just real quick for our listeners, how old are your kids now? Just age.
00;36;20;30 - 00;36;22;53
Emily or Erin
We've got a range between 16 and three.
00;36;22;58 - 00;36;23;15
Erik
60.
00;36;23;26 - 00;36;46;47
Emily or Erin
Five kids all about. It's all about three years apart. But yeah, no, that's like it's a beautiful thing to do as we've done. It was like newlyweds unity and you know, they're just like starting off with is and is also amazing to do with families that have older children because the kids can be a part of it like any stage that we really want to kind of like delving into this work.
00;36;46;47 - 00;36;50;54
Emily or Erin
It it will meet you where you're at and it's meaningful afterwards.
00;36;50;59 - 00;36;54;03
Erik
Okay. So sorry, we've got the the what.
00;36;54;08 - 00;36;55;31
Mike Allen
The how and the.
00;36;55;31 - 00;36;56;36
Erik
Why.
00;36;56;41 - 00;36;58;20
Mike Allen
And then the crest, which is just.
00;36;58;21 - 00;37;10;05
Erik
The crest, which is sort of a graphic summary of those ideas. And I know ours, ours has a sailboat in the mountains. And so I remember more precisely when I was watching you, you were going to say something.
00;37;10;07 - 00;37;39;35
Emily or Erin
Well, I wanted to go back because we've gone on this this awesome journey in our conversation. And you talked about meeting. It can be you where you are, which I love. And I kind of want to go back to that pivotal time when you realized this is our work. Our work is helping families and we're going to use the skills we have, both your design work and your work with the body and mind connection.
00;37;39;40 - 00;37;54;10
Emily or Erin
And you how did you start? Because I know you had like even then you were telling me of this this elaborate vision for how this could play out, like this whole campus. You know.
00;37;54;15 - 00;37;56;17
Erik
You get it, you're going to get a place.
00;37;56;22 - 00;38;17;53
Emily or Erin
You've been so and so. So I want to back up to that from Discovery. What was the what were the first action steps started really boldly just asking people like, hey, can we do this with your family? It's just an offering. It's so great. It's just, you know, it is super brave and like.
00;38;17;58 - 00;38;19;13
Erik
We were lucky enough to be one of them.
00;38;19;14 - 00;38;46;38
Emily or Erin
Well, thank you for being so willing, because we learned so much from each of the families that we worked with. And so we did that. We were just like I was literally just like, pray about it. And families would come to mind and every child be like, Hey, would you be willing to do this with us? And as we would do it, it would just become more clear, like the process of like how we can best guide a family through and the most efficient, clear way we would.
00;38;46;43 - 00;38;49;59
Emily or Erin
We revisited our guide previous, which was a little more.
00;38;50;00 - 00;38;50;42
Mike Allen
Basic guide.
00;38;50;42 - 00;38;51;27
Emily or Erin
Together. Yes.
00;38;51;41 - 00;38;53;15
Mike Allen
And then we kind of learned and adapted.
00;38;53;15 - 00;39;12;55
Emily or Erin
Yes, we would just make different iterations. And then as far as taking it to the next step, I remember I stayed in my living room and just getting this really clear, prompting to hold a women's retreat. Never done anything like that before, but I could see it in my mind's eye. I was like, I. I knew who to ask.
00;39;13;00 - 00;39;31;03
Emily or Erin
I knew where I wanted to have it. And I just started texting people like, Hey, I want to have a women's retreat on this weekend. Would you be willing to come? And an amazing gathering of women came and we did it at Camp Redwoods, Northern California. And it was just the most beautiful living, surrounded by redwoods and was a river.
00;39;31;03 - 00;39;50;10
Emily or Erin
We could go kayaking and anyway, so we just started to like, take that next bold step and just reaching out to people who felt safe, who we could practice and learn with and so I did that with women. We did that with families. We asked a couple of families, we want to do a family retreat. Would you be willing to come?
00;39;50;15 - 00;39;52;43
Emily or Erin
They did. And it was it was amazing.
00;39;52;57 - 00;39;54;38
Erik
And a family retreat, meaning the kids came.
00;39;54;43 - 00;39;57;04
Emily or Erin
Every once in a while.
00;39;57;09 - 00;39;57;41
Mike Allen
Multiple.
00;39;57;41 - 00;40;11;15
Emily or Erin
Families. So we had literally never done this before. We just were like, I think it's going to work. And we just made it work. Yeah, learn from it. And then from there, just like a lot of practice over the years.
00;40;11;19 - 00;40;12;49
Mike Allen
And then there was like a pandemic.
00;40;12;49 - 00;40;13;52
Emily or Erin
And then there.
00;40;13;57 - 00;40;15;43
Mike Allen
Is kind of fluke things.
00;40;15;47 - 00;40;21;31
Emily or Erin
Yeah, exactly in fact, everything shut down the weekend of my women's retreat, I sort.
00;40;21;36 - 00;40;22;00
Mike Allen
Of one.
00;40;22;00 - 00;40;26;24
Emily or Erin
Of them went that. Yeah, I don't know. But I was very heartbroken about that.
00;40;26;29 - 00;40;38;56
Erik
I have a question for you in this timeline because at some point I remember you saying, we're going to we're going to buy a place and we're going to that. We are going to do this thing with that. At this point, where is this further on?
00;40;38;59 - 00;40;41;02
Emily or Erin
Know, we had no idea how that was going to work.
00;40;41;07 - 00;40;46;40
Erik
But I remember imagining it. But remember using it. But it was but it was like there was no plan for it. Yeah.
00;40;46;45 - 00;40;47;05
Mike Allen
It was.
00;40;47;19 - 00;40;47;39
Emily or Erin
Like there.
00;40;47;39 - 00;40;52;52
Erik
Was no means available. You know, here's what we want to do this, but we have no idea how it's going exactly.
00;40;52;57 - 00;40;55;08
Emily or Erin
It was just something that see in our minds. I just.
00;40;55;16 - 00;40;57;12
Erik
Remember, like, I feel like you you said that.
00;40;57;20 - 00;40;57;40
Emily or Erin
We.
00;40;57;42 - 00;40;58;44
Erik
Long before had.
00;40;58;44 - 00;41;05;48
Emily or Erin
Any idea we had that vision, like from the get go. Like that same awful weekend that was all part of.
00;41;05;52 - 00;41;06;36
Mike Allen
The great into.
00;41;06;46 - 00;41;32;25
Emily or Erin
The and I know those have a few of those in our families and I love I would hear someone say like yeah Aaron just invited me over for like a really delicious salad and we went to do some purpose work and you literally just, I would just come into your dining room with your dining table to your living room, yet before you got this space at this camp or whatever you just said, now we know our purpose, so we're going to get to work.
00;41;32;29 - 00;41;52;11
Emily or Erin
Hey, who wants to come over to my house? And we're just doing it to get started doing the work consistently finding I think you just started and this will definitely say a lot about me, but I remember asking you were like, Well, do you have a website? Like, How can I share this with people? You know? And I was like, What is that?
00;41;52;11 - 00;42;14;40
Emily or Erin
It's like, how do you how do you not have a website? You're not building an email list like your husband obviously is pro and all this stuff has the skills for you. Like, no, we're just we're just going to work with people, we're just doing it. And then after it grew and I don't know how, when and where you decided to like bring the, the website online and all the other things.
00;42;14;40 - 00;42;36;34
Emily or Erin
But I just want to make it abundantly clear to anyone who's listening that there were zero obstacles between or like there was nothing. There were probably obstacles, but there was nothing in between you deciding, this is our purpose. And then you actually just getting started. You didn't have to you didn't have to have a logo, you didn't have to have a company name, You didn't have to have a special location.
00;42;36;34 - 00;42;39;27
Emily or Erin
You didn't have to have coordinated chairs. You didn't have to.
00;42;39;32 - 00;42;47;56
Erik
Brand color like you, a branding guy. You weren't like, let's get our brand nailed down first, or Who's going to go face in? Yeah, and start doing the thing.
00;42;48;00 - 00;43;14;16
Emily or Erin
Let's start work on all that. Yeah. Mala is sorry, helping people and I love it. I think it is so beautiful and so bold and. And so authentic. Well, yeah, it's awesome. There's. We just read it in the scriptures in first Nephi when he's asked to build this ship so that he's never done before. And it says repeatedly in the same verse it was not built after the matter of men and that just stands out like this thing was not built in the typical way.
00;43;14;20 - 00;43;31;34
Emily or Erin
And I can trust that, like the Lord can work with people who don't know what they're doing, but He never does it as all of us. And it has grown organically. It has grown through word of mouth. It's grown through just like personal experience. We've just evolved and it's evolved.
00;43;31;34 - 00;43;40;47
Mike Allen
It's evolved and changed into different and new opportunities that we some that we did not manifest him or foresee right back.
00;43;40;52 - 00;43;42;16
Erik
Where you can have everything when.
00;43;42;20 - 00;43;44;08
Emily or Erin
You're.
00;43;44;13 - 00;43;46;01
Erik
It's revealed itself along the way. Yeah.
00;43;46;08 - 00;44;07;55
Mike Allen
Shocker. Right. Okay. No I mean it is crazy how many things did come to fruition though, from that from that initial kind of creative weekend that we spent together, including this idea which you were alluding to this we were like, what if there is this property where we could go and have these beautiful experiences with individuals or families.
00;44;08;00 - 00;44;09;09
Emily or Erin
Gathering.
00;44;09;13 - 00;44;33;07
Mike Allen
And and like, what was it probably two years later that there was the pandemic? We ended up moving back to Utah. I didn't get fired from my job. Right. And that was that was actually such a tender mercy because we got to develop this stuff that we've been doing without the pressure of like we got to figure out how to make this work because we need to pay the bills.
00;44;33;12 - 00;44;51;31
Mike Allen
You know, it was like we could do this on the side. I could continue focusing on work and and by the way, it worked out way better after that around I get to I got to do some of the some of the coolest work of my career after that like low point like things just I ended up getting a totally different boss.
00;44;51;31 - 00;45;06;17
Mike Allen
And then another boss after that and another one after that. And those last few, I just had like great relationships, really, really supportive and awesome and like empowering and just all the good things. And so all these beautiful things came in the wake of that low point.
00;45;06;32 - 00;45;24;30
Erik
Okay, I have a question about that. Yeah, it never occurred to me until now, which is, do you feel like those shifts came because of things that were completely outside of your control, or do you think you had this this weekend where you were just like, my goodness, we're energized. We're like, I'm going to lose my job.
00;45;24;34 - 00;45;40;49
Erik
The world is open to us. What do we want to do? And then did you show up as a different person and do you think that was a factor? Yeah. So I mean, and it might have been a blend, but I'm just yeah, I never thought of you coming into your workplace with a new sort of persona. Right?
00;45;40;49 - 00;45;43;06
Erik
Perhaps. Or at least a new vibe.
00;45;43;06 - 00;46;06;54
Mike Allen
Energy. Yeah. Yeah. No, there for sure was a shift for me internally where I wasn't so preoccupied with how work was going, and then my own self-doubts and whatever, like that was majorly like reduced or reduced. Yeah, but the, I'm sure it was a combination of things. There was no moment where I went back and I was like, here's a new man.
00;46;06;54 - 00;46;33;41
Mike Allen
Like, Here's what a Yeah, that would have been cool. My But no, I think that like going back to work with a clear purpose, the way that I interacted with people, I felt like more opportunities came up for me to talk about things that really mattered to me. That was based on my intention and purpose. And it wasn't related to like creating excellent, you know, branding materials or whatever.
00;46;33;41 - 00;46;53;25
Mike Allen
It was sort of like we'd get into some personal topics, you know, with and I'd be like, This is an opportunity to talk about things that I really care about and that really matter. And so I was having great conversations like that. It wasn't directly tied to like my performance as far as the things I was measured on.
00;46;53;30 - 00;47;32;55
Mike Allen
And I still it took a while to get out of that muck, you know, it wasn't like an instant change. There was sort of a little bit of that turbulence for it to write for a while. Exactly. Yeah. And then it just continued to get better, which is amazing. But that was all leading to the point of it was probably what, two years after that, after the pandemic, we moved to Utah and then suddenly we found ourselves just in this totally unexpected circumstance where we actually were able to get a property in Midway and we were like and was looking at a couple of different spots and we went and looked at them and there
00;47;32;55 - 00;47;55;00
Mike Allen
was one there was just this little corner property, pretty, pretty small, like more affordable, you know, all the reasons to like, consider it. And we went checked it out and then we went to this other one to have this. It was just this beautiful property. And but, but like there's a humility about it. It was like simple. It was not so special.
00;47;55;00 - 00;47;59;12
Erik
It's kind of a rustic, rustic, like a homey, like a soul to it.
00;47;59;14 - 00;48;20;23
Mike Allen
Yet it had so much soul and character, a bit of a fixer upper, lots of issues. But we we got there and you go across this little bridge over a little pond with koi fish in it. I mean, are you kidding me? Right? Right. But and again, though, not like super fancy, it was just simple but like, so special.
00;48;20;27 - 00;48;38;43
Mike Allen
And you go across this little wooden bridge and you get to the house and the front door, it says on this wooden engraving, on the front door, it says, a place of safety and peace. And the doorknob is a beehive temple like a salt lake City temple doorknob with the beehive engraved on it.
00;48;38;48 - 00;48;39;35
Erik
Or like, how did.
00;48;39;49 - 00;49;06;39
Mike Allen
They get the temple door knob on this house? Yeah, sure. It's a replica. So. But we were just like, Wow. Yeah, I know. So we were just like, this is this is cool. Like, this is special. And then we went in and there was this more and more little artifacts, and the previous owner had, like, hand-painted all these beautiful things in the house and literally on the, on the floor of the office, there's this seal that says the glory of God is intelligence.
00;49;06;39 - 00;49;26;28
Mike Allen
And you walk in to the office. So we were just like, blown away by all these things. And I look at a picture on the wall and there's a guy I recognize and I'm like, my gosh, that's Travis, who I knew from New York City, you know? And it turns out that's his mom's house that's for sale and property.
00;49;26;33 - 00;49;48;14
Mike Allen
And so I texted him and was just like, Travis, I just saw this news, this incredible house and property. And I was like, Man, it's so special. It's so cool. It's a bit out of our price range, but so awesome on my glad we got to check it out. And then he goes, Well for us, like it really matters who the buyer is because there's so much nostalgia and meaning and whatever.
00;49;48;18 - 00;49;51;58
Mike Allen
And he's like, just maybe, you know, think about what he offered or maybe.
00;49;51;58 - 00;49;53;49
Erik
Even offer you if you can't afford.
00;49;53;49 - 00;50;06;28
Mike Allen
Yeah, exactly. My mom Exactly. And so we put in an offer that was significantly lower. Not crazy, but like a decent you know, amount below the asking or the listed price.
00;50;06;28 - 00;50;12;10
Emily or Erin
Not something you would have dared to. Yeah. Make as an offer if you hadn't got that much from Travis.
00;50;12;15 - 00;50;43;37
Mike Allen
Exactly. And they came back and we met his, his mom too. And, and she had a really special connection that, like, just reconnected right away, I should say. And we put in that offer and they countered like just a little bit. And they said, we we know like the fact that you guys have this intention for this property and that you care about all of the little quirks and like special hand-painted touches and whatever that we.
00;50;43;37 - 00;50;45;47
Erik
Got, you know, that that's going to get painted over. Yeah.
00;50;45;52 - 00;51;00;45
Mike Allen
We didn't want to come in with a wrecking ball and like start over because some people probably would have done that with that location and that space and everything. And so it worked out like we ended up getting that place and it was amazing. Yeah.
00;51;00;49 - 00;51;05;27
Emily or Erin
I will say this really briefly how my life had a moment in the front room.
00;51;05;27 - 00;51;06;46
Erik
That's the one.
00;51;06;50 - 00;51;07;37
Mike Allen
With the mother.
00;51;07;37 - 00;51;27;00
Emily or Erin
Yeah, it's amazing. And she said that when she first got the place, it was shortly after the divorce felt like things had fallen apart. She got very broken, and the house at that point was in really, really bad condition. She was a there were like holes in the walls, like you just need her a lot of work. And I'll never forget this.
00;51;27;02 - 00;51;44;30
Emily or Erin
She said she was standing there in the front room just looking at this feeling for a moment, and that she just felt the spirit say, Just watch what I can do with those who trust me. And then she just poured so much love and she's like, I just wanted to create a place of healing for me and for my family.
00;51;44;30 - 00;52;05;39
Emily or Erin
And she's like, I did anything I wanted to do even was against the rules. And so she just, like, just created and painted and just like, did all the things. It just made her happy. And I feel like people go to that space and they can feel her faith, her healing, like the intention that she created. It's like infused into the walls, into the floor.
00;52;05;39 - 00;52;24;19
Emily or Erin
Like people will come in, they'll be like, I just feel like I'm home. Or is this a place where people can go to grieve? It's a place where people can go to rejoice. They've had families go like to celebrate the birth of a baby or how many words can our one of our daughters. Yeah, it is this special place.
00;52;24;19 - 00;52;47;02
Emily or Erin
I think that because of who she is and how she lived in what she poured into it, it has a very, very special feeling. And I feel that it's just amazing, the orchestration, that somehow it was available right when we were looking at somehow we were able to like, make this offer. And I'm just still amazed that that actually so orchestrated.
00;52;47;04 - 00;52;47;50
Emily or Erin
So orchestrated.
00;52;47;50 - 00;52;51;11
Erik
I love that watch what I can do with people who trust me.
00;52;51;15 - 00;52;53;03
Emily or Erin
And this power that stays with.
00;52;53;03 - 00;53;05;47
Erik
Me. Okay, you first. First of all, I want to I want you to tell us what you've named it. And I don't want to jump ahead to because you've invited us to teach in this space. And we spent some time there. So I want to jump ahead to that, if that's okay. Yeah. So tell us the name of the place.
00;53;05;52 - 00;53;07;14
Emily or Erin
The name of the place is Bridge Haven.
00;53;07;27 - 00;53;11;15
Erik
Which I love. You have to go across the bridge. Across the courtyard? Yeah.
00;53;11;28 - 00;53;18;43
Emily or Erin
Into the house, into the into the haven. It feels like crossing that bridge is literally. You are crossing a threshold. Yes. I'm kind of. It's a.
00;53;18;43 - 00;53;19;24
Erik
Beautiful.
00;53;19;24 - 00;53;28;51
Emily or Erin
Yeah. Visceral. Physical. Yeah. The physical experience of, like, walking into this space and the environment that's there is very conducive to the intention of that space. So and I.
00;53;28;51 - 00;53;51;59
Erik
Think how you invited us to come there was is indicative of how you've gone about all of this. You just said would you be willing and we were living in California briefly during the pandemic and you said, will you come teach, do a retreat at this new property that we own and and you just said, just tell us what you need, you know, and we'll make it happen.
00;53;52;06 - 00;53;54;41
Erik
You you know, you kind of.
00;53;54;46 - 00;54;04;06
Emily or Erin
What was the first time? Yeah. And so we were like, well, we'll just figure it out together. And we felt so safe to do that. Yeah, Yeah, we made it because we hadn't done one of those before either for couples anyway.
00;54;04;18 - 00;54;20;22
Erik
And so just to kind of describe what it was we well, actually, why don't you describe how it was from your side. Because we came, we just road trip out there and we ended up spending the weekend and you guys invited as you do, you just sort of felt invited people that you felt should be there. Why don't you talk through?
00;54;20;22 - 00;54;22;52
Erik
Because you've done a couple of things there before we came, right?
00;54;22;53 - 00;54;27;57
Emily or Erin
Yeah, that's like a few like fairly did women's retreats up into that point right? Yeah, That's probably this is.
00;54;27;57 - 00;54;28;22
Erik
The first.
00;54;28;22 - 00;54;30;52
Emily or Erin
Couple, the first couples retreat that we did there.
00;54;30;53 - 00;54;39;34
Erik
So why don't you talk about, you know, kind of getting into that and then what it felt like just the space becoming the thing that you imagined?
00;54;39;39 - 00;54;58;44
Emily or Erin
it was. I don't know. Are there words that just the realization of a dream, like something that you could see your mind for so long? And just because I have faith in this, suddenly here we all are in the same room together. And then I think about the connections of the people that needed you and how that has shifted the trajectory of their lives.
00;54;58;44 - 00;55;09;08
Emily or Erin
And I'm just like, I just continue to be amazed, like, again, like, watch what I can do with those who trust me. And all of us are just stepping into that. And I just.
00;55;09;08 - 00;55;31;47
Erik
Want to say to other couples that have been on this podcast where at that retreat exactly moved in and Natalie Reeves and Shiny and Jason Kilpatrick. And so yeah it's kind of it's rippling out. Yeah. So yeah I mean I'm just I'm still asking the question in a very particular way, but just like, you know, what does it become or how you know, so you bonds.
00;55;31;48 - 00;55;34;33
Emily or Erin
Are we now. Yeah. Come on. You know you.
00;55;34;33 - 00;55;48;31
Erik
Bought it from Hilma and it was this needed work and then, you know Mike put his awesome design touch on it and you both kind of like, redecorate the place. And it's a beautiful home and, you know, and now you use it for lots of things.
00;55;48;31 - 00;55;49;31
Emily or Erin
Yeah. Yeah.
00;55;49;36 - 00;55;58;52
Erik
So just, just got like, talk about that because you're using it for men's retreats, which I've also been to. Yeah, Yeah. Just kind of like, you know, fill us in a little bit about the picture, about what it is now and how it.
00;55;58;52 - 00;56;15;20
Mike Allen
Now it runs. Well. It was cool how there was this initial intention of again, the what? But we didn't have the how and then we and then it was like, okay, how we'd love to have a place. And then that all unfolded and now it's like, okay, we have this, this destination, this place to be able to do these things.
00;56;15;25 - 00;56;23;35
Mike Allen
And it started with there and like doing women's retreats there and just coming back and be like, that was so incredible. It was so amazing. You know, I.
00;56;23;43 - 00;56;29;08
Erik
Have to say also for my part, when you're like, yeah, we now have the place was like, my goodness, how do they do.
00;56;29;08 - 00;56;30;39
Emily or Erin
It all happening?
00;56;30;43 - 00;56;38;50
Erik
Like they said, we none of us were like, How is it going to work out? None of us knew. Yeah. And then you're like, We've got it. Yeah.
00;56;38;54 - 00;56;49;10
Mike Allen
I mean, I told you one part of that story, right? Of of how we were able to, like, put in an offer that we were able to make it work. There's like, so much more to it than that.
00;56;49;15 - 00;56;51;26
Emily or Erin
That could so many ago.
00;56;51;31 - 00;56;52;34
Erik
Yeah, it was, it.
00;56;52;34 - 00;57;20;15
Mike Allen
Was just like this path was just unfolding one step at a time and some very significant steps, you know, at the time, that story being one of them that I shared earlier. But yeah, it was sort of this and it was also for our family, right? So this idea of strengthening families, that's part that's like, yeah, that's core to our purpose statement, which our family purpose statement is to seek to know the living God, to strengthen the family and help build Zion.
00;57;20;20 - 00;57;41;44
Mike Allen
And so our own family inclusive. Right. And so we would go to that place just with our kids and spend a weekend there and, and they'd run around and the and the property and, you know, or play in the snow in the winter or whatever it is. Right? So there's those kinds of gatherings that we would have that's maybe a more typical like somebody has a little getaway family sort of cabin or whatever, right.
00;57;41;49 - 00;58;04;42
Mike Allen
So there's that purpose. But then we had the the individuals and families that we wanted to do this work with. And when we were thinking of how can we get couples or families to be more a part of what we're doing there? That's where we were. You know, we had our own quest and purpose work that we had been doing, and we're like, what would a whole experience around that look like?
00;58;04;47 - 00;58;17;04
Mike Allen
And then I can't remember what point we, like thought of you guys or how that happened, but we were like, it'd be so awesome for the audience to come and just speak to some families that we know, some story.
00;58;17;10 - 00;58;22;54
Emily or Erin
And so you guys just want everyone to meet you. Yeah.
00;58;22;59 - 00;58;23;47
Emily or Erin
So yeah, which.
00;58;23;48 - 00;58;26;27
Mike Allen
Inspiring story, you know, and we just imagine.
00;58;26;27 - 00;58;39;32
Emily or Erin
Like, I knew, I mean, I was like, I know this is going to be amazing. And so we just started inviting and then like with the women's retreats and the men's retreats, like it just we just started inviting in. They started happening. I mean, there was.
00;58;39;37 - 00;58;58;24
Mike Allen
There was an evolution to it. And so we imagined doing just like seminars where it was honestly stuff that we wanted to experience ourselves. We're like one of because we could just have the audience come and like, tell their story, you know, and then we want to have like the Covington's do something and just all the amazing people in our lives.
00;58;58;24 - 00;59;16;02
Mike Allen
We're like, Let's just get together there. And I mean, we could just all hang out somewhere, but wouldn't it be cool if we gave them a place to purpose, intentionally gather and like teach us and share things and talk about it and ask questions and really, like, get into the good stuff, you know?
00;59;16;04 - 00;59;39;33
Emily or Erin
And I feel like we've been so blessed through the different moves and the different people that we've met through the years. We know amazing people. We have amazing friends in our lives and we love creating spaces where they can share their expertise, they can share their stories, they can shine even they mean it. So I don't know. It's just been incredible seeing to connect worlds, I guess, and to be like, you got to hear the story.
00;59;39;33 - 00;59;58;21
Emily or Erin
You got to like we had Joseph Ricki come share about a temple symbolism and say your geometry and like that was remarkable you know and just like there's so many people out there who feel like everyone has something amazing to share. And so to have a space where that can happen and it just almost feels very natural at this point.
00;59;58;21 - 01;00;10;48
Emily or Erin
It doesn't feel so scary, it doesn't feel so hard. And people want to gather purposefully. I feel like I feel like that's something that is really needed. Needed. Yeah. I mean, it.
01;00;10;52 - 01;00;12;30
Erik
Might have been one of the cameras turning off.
01;00;12;30 - 01;00;13;26
Mike Allen
I don't know. Okay.
01;00;13;31 - 01;00;15;37
Emily or Erin
Of course. Well.
01;00;15;42 - 01;00;34;46
Erik
Actually, before we move off to this, I want to say I think that's a really important point that it's a lot less hard now that you you've learned a lot. You've done a lot of things that felt impossible. Is it safe to say that you you had an idea, but you had no idea.
01;00;35;00 - 01;00;36;46
Mike Allen
Never imagined we'd be doing this.
01;00;37;00 - 01;00;53;37
Erik
And it's come to fruition and you're saying, yeah, now, like because you've invited us to a lot of things and we've been able to come to a couple of but not, not most of them, but the fact that you're just like, yeah, now we're going to do another one of those things that we've done so many of and there's an ease to it and, a comfort to it.
01;00;53;42 - 01;01;07;53
Erik
And Emily and I sometimes when we've actually we haven't talked about this in a while, but when we do corporate speaking gigs, it's like we talk about three kinds of camp confidence. There's competence. Confidence comes from getting a new skill.
01;01;08;02 - 01;01;09;22
Mike Allen
Competence.
01;01;09;27 - 01;01;37;21
Erik
From credibility, doing what you say do. When we do, we say, well, do we become more confident and mean we become more calm because we realize that whatever is going to come up, we're going to figure it out because you have a track record with yourself. Yeah. And I feel like you guys have established a track record for yourself and you have the skills of, you know, you, you beta tested this with lots willing individuals and families and you've also you've done what you've said you would do.
01;01;37;26 - 01;01;57;34
Erik
And so just hearing you say those things, I feel the confidence that you have in what you're doing now. I mean, I felt it before the confidence of we want to go in this direction now. It's the confidence of look at what's look at what has happened. Yeah. And and you can now like look at what we've done and what we've done.
01;01;57;34 - 01;02;01;11
Erik
But just saying there's we can point to all evidence.
01;02;01;11 - 01;02;02;17
Mike Allen
And there's experience.
01;02;02;28 - 01;02;12;33
Erik
And it's gone from theoretical to actual and that shows up in how you think about and feel about and talk about it, at least from my perspective.
01;02;12;38 - 01;02;24;24
Emily or Erin
And I can just say from experience, it feels amazing to have a purpose. It feels amazing to live your purpose That doesn't mean that it's easy. my goodness. It's it's really hard sometimes.
01;02;24;39 - 01;02;28;14
Erik
But you guys are you guys. Lives have not been perfect.
01;02;28;19 - 01;02;39;38
Emily or Erin
Yeah, I think, though, we've gotten bigger. I think that we're so fulfilling and there's so much joy.
01;02;39;43 - 01;02;42;08
Mike Allen
Yeah. And there's. There is opposition.
01;02;42;12 - 01;02;43;24
Emily or Erin
You know, when there is when.
01;02;43;24 - 01;03;10;19
Mike Allen
You are seeking to do a good work, there is like a there are opposing forces. And sometimes that's the kind of thing where maybe it is signals of like, maybe we're not on the right track and we need to, you know pivot or and that's a lot of, you know, introspection and prayer. Sometimes though, it's literally just we resistance before doing a good thing or doing something that might be life changing.
01;03;10;20 - 01;03;33;44
Emily or Erin
Can I? Sure. I mean, I'm not saying that these were going to be life changing, but like there was a pattern for a while there that I was just like, great, every time I would do a woman's retreat, some big disaster would happen every time, like our fireplace literally, like, fell out of the wall because of all the snow, Like the way that the snow just pulled the whole place out of jail in the fireplace celebrating from the house.
01;03;33;44 - 01;03;35;00
Emily or Erin
Yeah. And so you.
01;03;35;05 - 01;03;36;48
Erik
Say you just want a new fireplace.
01;03;36;53 - 01;03;46;09
Emily or Erin
Know it dropped out three days before my women's retreat? What's amazing is God provided and we are still able to hold the women's retreat.
01;03;46;14 - 01;03;46;52
Mike Allen
We've got it for.
01;03;46;52 - 01;03;49;19
Emily or Erin
Two weeks and supported up, patched up. Okay. I was like, there.
01;03;49;19 - 01;03;52;06
Mike Allen
Was a good news. You became in a hole.
01;03;52;06 - 01;03;53;58
Emily or Erin
And it was like. It was like you were.
01;03;54;05 - 01;03;58;28
Mike Allen
Like outside on the snow. And this was winter. I mean, it was.
01;03;58;33 - 01;04;20;10
Emily or Erin
And then just a few months later, again, days before my next one was a tree. Are the pond flooded everywhere just because of all the runoff and all that? wow. So there was there's just like lots of things that come up and it's so often right before an event or a retreat or a gathering. But what's cool, I had a moment where patterns are interesting.
01;04;20;15 - 01;04;40;06
Emily or Erin
The Lord works through patterns, and I remember this moment where he taught me like, reframe this. Every time something happens, it seems like a disaster. I want you to reframe it because you're about to see a miracle. You're going to see a miracle. I will follow through. I will play through this one. And he has every time he's never let us down.
01;04;40;11 - 01;04;57;23
Emily or Erin
And so I feel less and less concerned and less of a feeling of dread. Like I would almost feel like this, like heaviness before a big event because I'm like, what's going to happen? But at this point, I'm like, It's going to be okay. He absolutely will follow through and I have nothing to worry about. It's going to work out every day.
01;04;57;27 - 01;05;23;57
Emily or Erin
So there's been confidence building, but not easy. Not easy. So what have been I appreciate you talking about some of the obstacles, and I'm sure there are, you know, spiritual obstacles that come up as well. absolutely. So, so many as as you turn the soil and you reinvent yourself to become capable and comfortable with these new things, then obviously you're always going to discover some new things.
01;05;23;57 - 01;05;46;26
Emily or Erin
So I'm curious what are that was a great insight about just like that growing confidence and trust that lots of obstacles will continue happening and then you and the Lord will be there for you. What are some of the other, I guess, the insights, the takeaways, these kind of like, I don't know. I don't know what to write words with.
01;05;46;27 - 01;05;58;22
Emily or Erin
Like these things that you then treasure in your heart and say, here's a truth that I get to move forward with. Now that you have taken from this journey. that's a good question.
01;05;58;26 - 01;06;01;34
Mike Allen
Yeah, it is a good question. That's what I need to reflect on for a.
01;06;01;34 - 01;06;04;13
Emily or Erin
Moment.
01;06;04;17 - 01;06;19;08
Erik
While you're thinking I'm good here to choose where I'd love to go. After you answer that question, I'd love to talk a little bit about the light within us. We love to talk a little bit about here. And I think, you know, then we'll start to wrap up. But I want to just I don't want to not talk about this too.
01;06;19;08 - 01;06;20;55
Emily or Erin
Yeah. Where we where because.
01;06;20;55 - 01;06;24;28
Erik
Those are sort of out us. Is it safe to say those outgrowths of bridge.
01;06;24;33 - 01;06;25;17
Emily or Erin
Yeah.
01;06;25;22 - 01;06;30;27
Erik
All right. So and if you want to talk about those and then come back to Emily's question more time.
01;06;30;27 - 01;06;40;47
Emily or Erin
Yeah. It doesn't have to be every single thing that you learned or like the most. But what, what comes to mind first all like the shaping influence that that says has been Yeah.
01;06;40;51 - 01;06;54;35
Erik
Well I think you share well already which is I don't have to worry like you know kind of the dread before an event like it's going to be okay if the chimney separates from the house or there's flooding because you have this new trust in confidence. To me, that seems.
01;06;54;35 - 01;07;20;49
Emily or Erin
Like one of that. That's right. That would be that is the life changing. I want to say this like in the most like articulate, honest way possible, but just this realization from experience, not just from my belief or a theory that God is capable of doing his work, and that, amazingly, he invites us to collaborate with him, like what the God of the universe was to work with me.
01;07;20;54 - 01;07;45;27
Emily or Erin
He must work through my hands and my words, and I often just feel so inadequate and so like, I've got nothing to offer. But he can I know that he can work through the week, through the simple, through the broken. And as we come together, it just was that it was like if we're just willing to show up, he's got miracles prepared and that every single person has something.
01;07;45;27 - 01;08;06;30
Emily or Erin
So important to share. And when we come together, I feel like we can like, reflect that to each other during the women's retreats that I want everyone who comes is invited to share. And that's just been such a beautiful thing. It's not just like me sharing all the sessions. It's like they come and everyone has something to offer.
01;08;06;31 - 01;08;21;49
Erik
I was going to say that was your format from the beginning when you in first said, Hey, I want to do a women's retreat, and you invited that. Ladies and gentlemen, I need you to take 20 minutes. And you did take 20 or how much you gave exactly. Everyone was contributing. It wasn't just not like I'm going to just feed you and you're listening to me.
01;08;21;54 - 01;08;40;46
Emily
Exactly. You. And it's like the Lord actually gave me that idea for the very first one that I did back in 2019. And I feel like the hearts of the women who come are in a different space where they're also sharing. I feel like there's like a oneness spirit, an openness, a vulnerability, a willingness to like it's not just like a passive experience.
01;08;40;56 - 01;08;43;47
Mike Allen
You're a better listener when you know you're going to be present.
01;08;43;47 - 01;08;45;54
Emily
Yeah, yeah. It's like it's like.
01;08;46;00 - 01;08;48;58
Erik
It's like an emotional, spiritual, intellectual potluck.
01;08;49;08 - 01;08;50;20
Emily
Yeah, yeah.
01;08;50;35 - 01;08;52;39
Erik
And it all blends together to make a beautiful meal.
01;08;52;39 - 01;09;12;32
Emily
And there has been like, this is something that I've learned. There's so much that I can't control at this point that people are coming to my routine. I don't know them, I don't know their backgrounds, don't know their stories. And there's a massive amount of trust that I need to have that the Lord has slowly built with me to like for the space.
01;09;12;32 - 01;09;31;00
Emily
And I'm like, I don't know what's going to come out of people's I don't know if everyone's going to get along or if it's going to be compatible. But it's been amazing to see that every single time. It's exactly right. It's exactly right. And I have just learned to just trust him, just trust him. This is his work and he's working through each and every one of us.
01;09;31;04 - 01;09;36;29
Emily
And so that feels really light. I'm this work that feels very light.
01;09;36;34 - 01;09;39;12
Erik
When it's not on your shoulders. That's excellent.
01;09;39;21 - 01;10;06;05
Mike Allen
That's awesome. I mean, the things that came to my mind were more around the audience that I'm currently serving most, which is men. And there's a lot of insights that have come from working guys, which there's just a lot of like stigma and stereotype around when men get together and hang out. You know, it's it goes about this deep and whatever this need.
01;10;06;19 - 01;10;07;10
Emily
Like we're.
01;10;07;10 - 01;10;10;46
Mike Allen
Just going to talk about sports and whatever.
01;10;10;51 - 01;10;15;44
Erik
And I, having been with you, I know that's not how it is. Now. You go a mile deep.
01;10;15;49 - 01;10;38;35
Mike Allen
Which I mean, we well, that's it's not even that I try. It's like if you give men opportunity to open up where it feels safe, where they can be vulnerable, where they can recognize that it's like a safe to talk about how they're really feeling, how they're really doing. That's one of the stigmas, right? It's like, I guess a lot of talk about that stuff.
01;10;38;39 - 01;10;40;28
Mike Allen
I think that's false.
01;10;40;33 - 01;10;44;22
Erik
I love to talk about it. Yeah, just hungry for a place, people.
01;10;44;26 - 01;11;11;51
Mike Allen
It's like you have to create the environment and the space for it, where it's welcome and where it's safe and where it's encouraged even. And then you just it can go so deep and have these amazing conversations and connections with people. And that to me was just one of those insights, which is like there's sort of this stigma around issues that were to get around the male mind and it's like.
01;11;11;56 - 01;11;14;45
Emily
Yeah, you know, this is going on for decades.
01;11;14;45 - 01;11;38;28
Mike Allen
Yeah, absolutely. So to be able to like witness how that can actually unfold in a space like that, it's it's been a really powerful, amazing thing. And then and then how much people sometimes they don't even realize that I've heard this feedback so many times someone will come to a retreat, maybe their friend invited them or they were just curious or whatever, and they'll leave going.
01;11;38;33 - 01;11;57;08
Mike Allen
I have no idea how much I needed that, you know, like it's like this thing. I didn't even know I was missing that I was craving. Like deep down, maybe under some layers of suppression or whatever it is. Right. Or distraction. I mean, I experienced that when I was just really busy at work. It's like you're so distracted.
01;11;57;08 - 01;12;19;47
Mike Allen
You don't really take the time to go inward and to really check in with how is my heart and soul doing right? You just are kind of like, Go, go, go. And so you give people some space to explore that and to reconnect with that and get in touch with that internal part of themselves. And they are just so nourished by it and so blessed by that.
01;12;19;47 - 01;12;39;14
Mike Allen
They're like, I need to do this. Like all the time. Know regular on the regular. Yeah. And so that those are the kinds of things that came to my mind from your original, very poignant question. And I'm sure that I have some personal takeaways too, that I could get to about that. That's, that's where my head, when.
01;12;39;19 - 01;13;06;17
Emily
I think of my follow up question for both of you would be, well, coming from a marriage partnership that is also trying to do some good in the world together in this more codified way, like what have been some benefits to your relationship through doing this work, supporting each other in this work, whether you're doing it together or branching out with the same purpose?
01;13;06;22 - 01;13;15;02
Emily
Yeah, our relationship has gotten a lot more honest and open in communication because.
01;13;15;07 - 01;13;15;34
Mike Allen
It's what we're.
01;13;15;34 - 01;13;43;10
Emily
Practicing. It's, you know, it's it's been really good. It's been stretching, It's been really stretching. But like, in a healing way, I feel like it's just very safe to be real with each other. Whereas maybe in the past, not that it wasn't safe, that we just didn't have the same kinds of conversation, I feel like. And we get it like when he comes home and tells you guys, you're treated like I get it.
01;13;43;10 - 01;13;54;23
Emily
And like when I share with him or share the challenges or the joy is like, we get it because we are doing this like arm in arm unity. I mean, and it's just beautiful to be able to share it at that level.
01;13;54;37 - 01;14;21;43
Mike Allen
Absolutely. So we had a retreat with the hair Brotherhood down at Zion National or near Zion National Park, and like a glamping site nearby. And we have an app. And after the retreat, I mean, it was this incredible experience. There were like three of us there. And someone on the on the text on the app was like, how do you guys to your spouse or partner about what just happened?
01;14;21;47 - 01;14;25;11
Mike Allen
He's like, I don't even know how to talk about this with you.
01;14;25;15 - 01;14;26;03
Emily
You know?
01;14;26;08 - 01;14;41;20
Mike Allen
And people were literally sharing of like, I just read through my journal and, you know, that idea. And I just thought about that. I was like, Yeah, that would be hard if I experienced something like that and then tried to come back and talk to Erin, who maybe, maybe like she was like.
01;14;41;25 - 01;14;48;04
Erik
I was with the kids all weekend where you were on, you know, like we had totally different weekends, but yeah. So how do you. Yeah, how to communicate that.
01;14;48;04 - 01;15;03;48
Mike Allen
So there's been a more a deeper capacity to really, like, understand and empathize and and feel like so many times I'll explain something to Aaron and I won't get in teary eyed just talking about it because it was this beautiful moment and she's right there.
01;15;04;01 - 01;15;05;49
Emily
I'm like crying.
01;15;05;54 - 01;15;21;40
Mike Allen
And she's like, I could feel like I feel like I was there. You know? It's so that's been really cool to be able to not just I mean, have those experiences together in some instances, but then when we do them separately, we get to like share in the stories and the outcomes and the.
01;15;21;47 - 01;15;29;48
Emily
In your power feedback like, like insights and feedback that we can bounce off each other. Yeah, it's been really helpful to just again, just refining.
01;15;29;53 - 01;15;58;02
Erik
Yeah, I want to paint a picture a little bit for our listeners about here and the like. It's kind of like as a as somebody who is, you know, you're in it, but I'll say here, brotherhood is sort of a men's focused, nurturing men both in open conversation. I know that you do. We did breath work together. And I'm assuming that when you were down in Zion, there was sort of some outside exertion and yet.
01;15;58;02 - 01;16;09;25
Erik
Sure elements to it. Yeah. So that's that's the here brotherhood and I know you're strong on LinkedIn and you got your app and a website and then you got like within us which is closer to home.
01;16;09;29 - 01;16;12;30
Mike Allen
Yeah, that's it. That's where we're the partners of that.
01;16;12;39 - 01;16;20;42
Erik
And the two of you are doing that together. And I, and I know that it's a lot more yoga nights and some other kind of and I don't even know all the guys.
01;16;20;47 - 01;16;23;06
Emily
You should tell me. How are.
01;16;23;10 - 01;16;23;57
Erik
You guys that.
01;16;23;57 - 01;16;24;51
Emily
All nourishing.
01;16;24;51 - 01;16;27;40
Erik
Yeah. And it's always got good food.
01;16;27;44 - 01;16;53;01
Emily
We love to cook. I feel like the light in us was just created around the idea of making safe spaces together. So through yoga classes, through breathwork, meditation, whatever it is events, we love to do events again, either I've been mid-way or we're doing one in February. That's like, I've got a friend who is going to be doing a dance workshop.
01;16;53;01 - 01;17;05;45
Emily
And during that there's again, it's sort of like tapping or tapping into the amazing people that we know and giving them a space to share their beautiful gifts so that we can all be identified. So that's the light in us. Yeah.
01;17;05;48 - 01;17;10;09
Mike Allen
And it kind of originated. I think we finally like made the website speaking.
01;17;10;16 - 01;17;12;56
Erik
yeah. Like a few years ago and got the property.
01;17;12;56 - 01;17;16;07
Emily
Yeah, we got the subsidy. We're going actually give it a name.
01;17;16;12 - 01;17;18;16
Erik
A website that we're going to do some branding.
01;17;18;25 - 01;17;19;12
Emily
Yeah, exactly.
01;17;19;12 - 01;17;20;29
Erik
All backwards, but all beautiful.
01;17;20;40 - 01;17;21;36
Emily
You know.
01;17;21;41 - 01;17;41;30
Mike Allen
It's like we got the property first and then we made the site and then we worked on our In Highland. We have a space dedicated for like yoga or for, like a little studio space. So and that's one of the reasons we came up with like another name, because otherwise we would have just probably gone with Bridge Haven.
01;17;41;35 - 01;17;44;58
Mike Allen
But we're like, Well, no, we're doing work in different locations.
01;17;44;58 - 01;17;46;23
Erik
We have two physical locations.
01;17;46;33 - 01;17;49;32
Emily
Similar. Yeah. And you use some similarity.
01;17;49;32 - 01;17;54;44
Erik
Yeah, these kinds of events. But there are two spaces. Yeah. One that's more remote, one that's a little bit more accessible. Yeah.
01;17;54;44 - 01;18;16;00
Mike Allen
Yeah. I mean, the one spread at our house, right? So we're just, we're just doing events on like a Thursday night, take the kids in and then run out there and we'll do a yoga class or I'll do a breathwork session or whatever. So yeah, so that's, that's when we created that. And then the here brotherhood thing came quite a while after that.
01;18;16;00 - 01;18;41;34
Mike Allen
So I had I had started doing men's retreats like two years ago roughly, and I have been doing those for many months. I think I've done nine or ten retreats by the time one of the guys that came to one of my retreats met these other two guys, three linked and who were starting this Brotherhood thing. And so he just connected us because he was like, You guys are really on the same wavelength here of what you're trying to do.
01;18;41;39 - 01;19;07;35
Mike Allen
And so I met those guys, John and Justin, and they through a whole process, they invited me to be a co-founder with them and I had this moment of like I was in a pretty good groove at that point and I was like, This will shake things up, you know, like, this will This is taking on a big thing and but at the same time, I felt I felt just called to it.
01;19;07;35 - 01;19;29;22
Mike Allen
You know, I was like, I'm kind of already doing this. This is just a way to amplify through collaboration and partnering up with some people that have their whole networks and their reach and their and they were doing amazing things on LinkedIn like that. One guy's story I mentioned earlier, he was sharing that story on LinkedIn, which was super vulnerable and really raw.
01;19;29;22 - 01;19;56;35
Mike Allen
And just the responses that he was getting of people saying like, thank you and are like, I'm in that boat, you know, like just reaching out for help. And he was there for them. There were just beautiful things happening. And I was like, Yeah, let's let's jump in on this. And combined forces essentially. And so that has grown and evolved and become it's whole a whole other animal, you know, And it's been incredible.
01;19;56;40 - 01;20;05;29
Mike Allen
I feel like I was talking about this with somebody. I might have been Layla and our friend Layla would.
01;20;05;34 - 01;20;06;25
Erik
Shout out to New York.
01;20;06;26 - 01;20;08;56
Mike Allen
Yeah, there is in California.
01;20;09;01 - 01;20;10;01
Emily
Yesterday.
01;20;10;06 - 01;20;26;46
Mike Allen
I think it was in a conversation with her, but I was explaining how I was debating whether I wanted to sign up to be like a co-founder of a thing because I was like, I was in a good group. I like a good rhythm with what I was doing and I just decided to like, stretch and grow and jump into it.
01;20;26;46 - 01;20;45;08
Mike Allen
And she was like, that's interesting. So you chose to grow instead of maybe forced to grow in some other way. And that was like, Whoa, I did not think of it like that. You know, it's almost that like, do you choose to be humble or are you compelled to be humble? Yeah, You choose to grow or are you compelled to grow?
01;20;45;13 - 01;20;48;17
Mike Allen
And I was like, Yeah, I'm going to run with that.
01;20;48;22 - 01;20;51;30
Emily
We got to choose a better opportunity grow.
01;20;51;35 - 01;20;54;04
Mike Allen
That's been challenging, but it's been amazing too.
01;20;54;04 - 01;20;54;44
Emily
Yeah.
01;20;54;49 - 01;21;12;28
Erik
So, okay, so as we kind of come on the homestretch of our conversation, I don't know if you've got other questions want to ask, but I, I just want you to be thinking about what first of all, there are probably there are people listening to this that are going to have something that they're trying to create their lives.
01;21;12;32 - 01;21;41;12
Erik
They're trying to find their purpose. They're trying to to be intentional and step into something that they don't know how it's going to happen. I want you to add anything that you can say that might be helpful to them on their journey. And then I also and then people might also genuinely want to just know about like, hey, I want to go on on one of these men's retreats or I want to be a part of like with this, you know, where they can learn more to get the benefit of the things that you guys are doing and in offering.
01;21;41;16 - 01;21;47;45
Erik
So one thing that might be helpful in their journey and then something if they wanted to join in what you're doing, how they can learn more about that.
01;21;47;50 - 01;21;59;09
Emily
So you go the first thought that comes to me as far as just a helpful, very accessible tool is tool. Right, right, right, right, right, right.
01;21;59;13 - 01;22;00;31
Erik
And speak another language.
01;22;00;31 - 01;22;26;18
Emily
Yeah. You know, I just feel like that was such a huge part of our experience of this creation process. Writing is interesting because it involves like effort and agency on our part. I don't I think the Lord has so much to give, but I also think that there needs to be like a willingness to receive. And I feel like the more we're willing to write, the more he's willing to like, share during seeing.
01;22;26;18 - 01;22;50;47
Emily
And so if someone out there is, you know, wanting to get clear, I think it was Sir Francis Bacon who said writing makes an exact man. And I just think that like our words, like bringing whatever's out there into like words into something like that has is in the physical world, then that can just continue to like bring the dreams into the physical experiences, physical realm.
01;22;50;47 - 01;22;58;55
Emily
And it's there's something to it. It's just magical. This is a magical thing, and it's something that anyone could do at any at any point.
01;22;58;59 - 01;23;15;34
Mike Allen
Yeah. So maybe one step to add to that because that's where I had meant too, was like to take some time to like, write out what this dream is like. What? And you can start, I mean, when writing, you can kind of go big in the writing process, but then when it comes.
01;23;15;43 - 01;23;18;10
Erik
To Right, Yeah.
01;23;18;14 - 01;23;37;29
Mike Allen
Exactly. But then in the execution, it's like, okay, the how write how am I going to pull this off? I'm going to like, take a page from, from your guys's book and say, like, there's just things you can do to start small and in your navigators you have this laid out beautifully. So that's already there for people to access.
01;23;37;29 - 01;23;57;35
Mike Allen
But that idea of like, you don't have to go all the way to the big dream right away, but to just take little steps. And even so, my first men's retreat, I was I had like a vague idea of what I think it could look like. And I was just doing over it, like because Aaron would come back from these women's retreats and just be on cloud nine.
01;23;57;35 - 01;24;19;07
Mike Allen
And I'm like, Well, what would like a men's thing look like? You know? And Aaron was like, Well, let me just introduce you to someone I know who does men's retreats. Like, let's just start there. And I was like, That's great, You know, and maybe that's the find a mentor, you know, principle that you guys share, too. And so I met her friend Brian, and he he was so funny.
01;24;19;12 - 01;24;29;52
Mike Allen
I mean, he loved that I was feeling called to the work. And I love that about him. He was just very like open and collaborative. It wasn't sort of, you want to do this to well, now we're competitors, right? Yeah.
01;24;29;52 - 01;24;32;01
Emily
It's like, so no, I'd say yeah.
01;24;32;07 - 01;24;54;45
Mike Allen
So it was it was awesome the way he was approaching it. But he was he said, I've got to retreat this Friday. This was on a Tuesday or Wednesday. He's like, You got to come to my retreat on Friday. And it's so funny because I was like, Well, I don't know if I want to go to a retreat, but I just hope that I'm going to let go, I guess, because I don't know people there.
01;24;54;45 - 01;24;56;06
Mike Allen
I don't you know, all the.
01;24;56;11 - 01;24;57;03
Erik
All of the fears that.
01;24;57;03 - 01;24;57;55
Erik
Everybody that comes to you.
01;24;57;58 - 01;25;16;14
Mike Allen
Yes, exactly. Yeah, that's nice, dude. I can so empathize with anybody that I've invited. That's like. I don't know. I'm like, I get it. You're like, I know that feeling areas. But I went to one and then it was modeled to me like, here's all this. Here's a way you could structure it. Here's all these things that, that he did.
01;25;16;14 - 01;25;38;25
Mike Allen
So expertly. It was awesome. And it introduced me to some things that I was like, I got so much from that and I'd love to figure out what's my version of that. Like, How do I integrate something like that? And then of course, I had my other material and the stuff that I was doing. So I got to just kind of like Frankenstein, these things together and then all the stuff that Aaron does and has done and that we've experienced together.
01;25;38;30 - 01;25;58;06
Mike Allen
And so I started to put together like, I think this is what a little agenda would look like. And then my first step from there was to take some friends to lunch and tell them about this amazing experience I had and then tell them about me feeling called to do something and just saying, Would you guys be willing to try this with me?
01;25;58;06 - 01;26;22;54
Mike Allen
Like, Are you down to come stay overnight at this place in Midway and be like my first group and was like, I think it's going to be cool. Or he in? Yeah, I was like, And they were. They were down. They were like, Yeah, let's do it. And so and they actually kind of help me co-create over lunch I was talking about how to structure it and they had some suggestions and I was like, that's a great idea, you know?
01;26;22;59 - 01;26;51;42
Mike Allen
And I kind of tailored it and adjusted it based on feedback. And then we went and did it and it was incredible. Like it went so well. Like beyond my expectations, people had super powerful, meaningful spiritual experiences, really bonding. I mean, it was just this amazing thing. And then all of a sudden, like, yeah, I mean, you just are on cloud nine and you take off from that kind of experience, you know, talk about confidence building.
01;26;51;47 - 01;27;01;23
Mike Allen
I mean, it was so scary going into that and we all show up and I've got my agenda and it's like, okay, here we go again.
01;27;01;28 - 01;27;05;18
Emily
If I'm worried, nobody will show up or if I'm worried, everybody.
01;27;05;22 - 01;27;22;32
Erik
And I think I came to your second one if I'm nervous. Yeah, I think that's right. And it was very smooth and very I felt reassured, like Mike's got this organized and we're just going to go with it. And I felt very I felt safe and taken care of in the way I like. I could be at ease.
01;27;22;32 - 01;27;28;43
Erik
That's probably better because I just felt at ease because I feel like Mike knows what he's doing.
01;27;28;48 - 01;27;48;47
Mike Allen
And like my problems are sweating like I hope nobody figures me out. No. And then and now it's like I used to have to refer to all the material a lot like, what comes next? You know, I got, I want to, like, see this just right. And now it's at the point where it's kind of just there and it's yeah, it goes a lot more smoothly.
01;27;48;53 - 01;27;49;42
Mike Allen
So, yeah.
01;27;49;47 - 01;27;58;28
Erik
I love that. Guys, thanks for sharing those. And this has been such a fun conversation. We've been friends for how long? I mean, how many years?
01;27;58;43 - 01;28;00;21
Emily
And that's raising.
01;28;00;26 - 01;28;22;40
Erik
Our kids forever together anyway. And so long, long time. And it's just a delight to sit down with you and to to hear a longer version of things that we've known a lot about, but not not everything that you share tonight. So that's been really great for us. And before, you know, before we wrap up, you know, I want you to tell people where they can learn more about what you're doing.
01;28;22;40 - 01;28;24;51
Erik
Did you have any closing questions that you want to ask?
01;28;24;51 - 01;28;58;13
Emily
Emily? I don't have any more questions for you guys. You're off the hook for now. No, I really appreciate you being so open and just this is the real you. This is the real stuff. These are the kind of conversations you have when there's no microphones and cameras around. And I appreciate you so much This is showing up honestly, and I think setting a great example for what it looks like and sounds like to be someone who has pursued and discovered and gotten in the path of doing the work of your purpose.
01;28;58;14 - 01;29;19;40
Emily
Right. And one of the things besides just how much we love to be around you and how inspiring you are and full of light and always looking for the good and being humble and seeing the best in others. I was really happy to have you come on, because we talk a lot about outdoor adventure and it can be incredible.
01;29;19;40 - 01;29;50;43
Emily
It's such an efficient way to make a connection, right? Or to be out of your comfort zone or learn something. But that isn't what is on everybody's heart, right? That isn't what everybody feels called to or drawn to. And and so we were just really excited to be able to interview you that you were willing to share your story so that people can listen and say, wait a minute, when Eric and Emily are talking about your dream or your goal or your vision or whatever it is, it can be so many different things.
01;29;50;43 - 01;30;08;40
Emily
Yeah, but we get to a point in life where, like you said, you're like, and I realize I was distracted, that I was just kind of like humming along in a familiar rhythm, But I wasn't thinking too much about where I was going or why, you know? And once you had, you know, that's like the law of physics, right?
01;30;08;40 - 01;30;18;37
Emily
You're just going to be an object in motion is going to continue in motion until something else, you know, lets me up this and that. And then you're like, wait a minute, where am I going? What am I doing? You know, and I think a performance.
01;30;18;37 - 01;30;18;55
Erik
Review.
01;30;19;01 - 01;30;42;36
Emily
That that can happen at any time in our life. And I love I love that it was literally a performance review because we can do that for ourself. We can say, I want to just right now give myself a performance review, like how do I feel like my life is going and I am I feeling like the satisfaction of fulfilling a purpose, to have a sense of purpose and direction?
01;30;42;36 - 01;31;07;06
Emily
And so I'm just so happy for everyone who's going to be able to have a chance to listen to this, to realize, I don't have to want to live on a sailboat or climb a mountain or write a book to be able to benefit from some introspection and some writing, maybe some prayer and just giving myself some space, you know, what am I meant for?
01;31;07;11 - 01;31;32;26
Emily
Yeah. And then realizing that it's worth the challenge. You work to get in alignment with that over and over again. Like there's a refocus element is great. So thank you. Thank you so much for just making that abundantly apparent that we're each here with a special call and, and that this is what it looks like to heed the call.
01;31;32;30 - 01;31;43;51
Mike Allen
Thank you. Yeah. It has been quite an adventure in spite of maybe lack of, like, flying across the world. Yeah. Has been its own kind of adventure. And the rewards have been incredible. Like.
01;31;43;56 - 01;31;45;03
Erik
Yeah, yeah.
01;31;45;08 - 01;32;17;38
Emily
So I just want to share. Like, I feel like the real work is always about what happens in the heart. The external thing definitely support that, but it doesn't have to look a certain way externally. And anyone who's listening, I just can say even if I haven't seen them or met them personally, like I know for a fact that they have a purpose and that it's already inside of you and that it's just waiting to be discovered.
01;32;17;42 - 01;32;20;58
Erik
I love that. Okay, what could go right? Okay.
01;32;21;13 - 01;32;22;18
Mike Allen
The liner notes.
01;32;22;23 - 01;32;25;23
Erik
Yet keep hospitals where they can find you websites or.
01;32;25;29 - 01;32;35;56
Mike Allen
National media, whatever. So it's the light in our story or the light within us. Lord, both will take you to the same place because so many times people are like, it's the light within us. But within, like.
01;32;35;56 - 01;32;36;52
Erik
I probably said it just.
01;32;36;52 - 01;32;40;24
Mike Allen
Like, know. Yeah, both are correct. Let me either one day.
01;32;40;27 - 01;32;42;36
Erik
Light it and light within us. Yes.
01;32;42;40 - 01;32;45;37
Mike Allen
Dot org. And that's where you'll see events.
01;32;45;42 - 01;32;46;37
Emily
Since.
01;32;46;41 - 01;33;00;28
Mike Allen
Midway and in Highland and yeah, there's classes, there's yoga, there's breathwork classes, there's kind of special workshop and weekend events. A lot of those are like couples or some family based.
01;33;00;33 - 01;33;08;24
Erik
And then I just say real quick that you host these in Utah, but you have people coming from not just Utah, they coming.
01;33;08;24 - 01;33;10;59
Mike Allen
Yeah, well, like places around the country. Yeah.
01;33;11;04 - 01;33;17;20
Erik
Yeah. We came from California. Yeah. Like, but you know, you don't have anyone that's listening. You don't have to live in Utah.
01;33;17;25 - 01;33;19;20
Mike Allen
yeah. With these events. Yeah, absolutely.
01;33;19;20 - 01;33;22;04
Erik
Just hop a flight to Salt Lake City and you can get that.
01;33;22;14 - 01;33;24;01
Emily
Okay, Compete with us.
01;33;24;06 - 01;33;42;32
Mike Allen
And then the the here brotherhood, which I have. Well, three other co-founders of that now we're a team of four co-founders. We are most easily found probably through our website, which is here, HAARP. It's a.
01;33;42;37 - 01;33;43;29
Emily
VR.
01;33;43;34 - 01;34;00;06
Mike Allen
Yes, exactly. So it's actually the combination of the spellings of both here. So I hear you, DJR, I'm listening and I'm here and present like I'm before you and I'm listening to you and I'm here for you. So it's both of.
01;34;00;06 - 01;34;01;22
Erik
You are.
01;34;01;27 - 01;34;25;51
Mike Allen
Exactly. Dot so it's it's here, bro. Scott I'm here. Product Yeah. Or find our app. And that's actually probably the better place to find us. So it's just the here brotherhood. It's on the Apple store, it's on Google Play and that's like the social platform. We, the social media has a lot of baggage. We were like, Well, we're not social media, we're social support.
01;34;25;56 - 01;34;50;55
Mike Allen
That's what we're going to call this, because it's a totally different intensive and different outcome than social media. So that's our social support platform and we do all kinds of cool amounts, a lot of our virtual like livestream events. So we'll do meditation sessions, we'll do we'll have speakers come on and sometimes it's like a life coach or a therapist or all kinds of different speakers will come on short things.
01;34;50;56 - 01;35;05;52
Mike Allen
Yeah, and we do retreats that are kind of bigger scale at different locations. And our next one is down in Arizona, April 11th to 14th, and we've got capacity to have a pretty good sized group down there. So it should be exciting.
01;35;05;57 - 01;35;18;06
Erik
Love it. That's awesome. And I just want to go back to this thing. I think I want to end here and what you're saying for anyone listening, this idea that you have a purpose. Yeah. What was the rest of it you said.
01;35;18;11 - 01;35;21;20
Emily
You have had already inside of it, just waiting to be discovered.
01;35;21;25 - 01;35;24;32
Erik
What could go right. Thanks. Well, as listening, everybody.
01;35;24;46 - 01;35;26;47
Mike Allen
Thank you. Thanks for having us, guys.
01;35;26;52 - 01;35;30;25
Emily
Yes, thank you.
01;35;30;30 - 01;35;36;09
Mike Allen
I have no idea what time it is. There we go. We will. Our 35.
01;35;36;14 - 01;35;38;51
Erik
I included rolling some of the beginning stuff.
01;35;39;06 - 01;35;42;01
Mike Allen
Okay. So you'll be at 120 maybe.
01;35;42;06 - 01;35;45;13
Emily
And yeah, we might do a single. Or we might.
01;35;45;13 - 01;36;02;31
Erik
If you want to go sailing with us this year, here's how that works. First of all, we just got back from the Bahamas last week, had a blast. We have a few more trips planned for this year. There's two ways that you can come sailing with us. One is you can book by the cabin. And I'm going to tell you what those opportunities are.
01;36;02;36 - 01;36;28;36
Erik
And two, you can just get a group of 6 to 10 people together. Let me know. We'll check our calendars, find a time that works. Pick a place that you're excited about that I want to go to and we'll make it happen. So reach out and let me know if you want to get a group together. If you want to book by the cabin, here's just you go to the awesome factory dot NYC Forward slash sailing 2024 and you can get the rundown on what's happening, how it all works.
01;36;28;40 - 01;36;44;25
Erik
And at the bottom you can schedule a time to chat with me. I'll answer all your other questions and see if we can find a trip that's a match for you. So if you want to get out on the water, go sailing somewhere fun this year. Would love to join you there. Thanks so much.
